Friday, January 19, 2007

Cyclone

Last night I had to take my boss and his GF out to dinner. When we finished they insisted to go to a bar for company paid drinks. I had other plans for last night but I couldn’t really say NO to my boss.

So, I took them to my favorite drinking spot in Dubai. My Boss, being American, likes to sit at the bar. Unlike him, I like tables in a dark remote corner of the room where I can see what is going around

Anyway, we were at the bar, my 55 year old boss was all over his 25 year old girlfriend doing and saying things to her that I really didn’t know were Kosher for a 55 year old (or Halal for that matter.)

His hand was all over the place, his lips were like a freaking machine and the 15 year old was making noises that would have awoken Kennedy from his grave.

After a few minutes of this and while I was slowly distancing myself from them, boss turns around and tell me: “This place is too quiet, we need action!”. Hey, what do I know about action in Dubai? “What kind of action?”. I figured making him talk would take his lips away from the girl’s breasts. Her dress was stained with saliva spots on the nipples. This was getting embarrassing. “A hot place with music, girls and action”

Well, I only know of one place in Dubai where he can suck his date’s nipples and have loud music and loose women around. Cyclone!

When we walked in, I could see the sheer excitement on his face. I could feel raw emotions coming from her. I could feel complete boredom falling on me!

They immediately disappeared in the crowd. I stood against a wall on the far side waiting for them to finish so I could take them home. I was getting really bored and looking at my watch every 5 min when a blond and blue eyed lady came up to me and asked me if I wanted to buy her a drink. I felt like having a drink but the bar was too crowded earlier so I told her that I would buy her a drink if she’d go get hers and get me one as well. I gave her a Dhs 100 note, it was all I had.

15 minutes later she returned with my appropriately named White Russian and she also conveniently forgot to give me the change. No matter, I was more than prepared to pay Dhs100 for a drink at that time.

We stood there for a few minutes saying nothing, then all of a sudden she turns around and lunges at me for a kiss on the lips. I play computer games all the time, I have the sharpest of reflexes, I turned my head just in time for the kiss to land on my cheek. Beaurk it was wet and I had to really resist the urge to wipe it off.

Then, I had an idea. A brilliant idea. One of those ideas that only come once in a lifetime. I offered her Dhs1000 if she’d go to my boss, kiss him and offer him a free night of passion. She’d get another 1000 if she was able to make it a threesome with the 10 year old Girlfriend.

Isn’t it amazing what an incentivised woman can accomplish? It took less than 5 min for the three of them to head to the door with my boss giving me the thumbs up. After they went out, the girl came back to collect her extra 1000. I haven’t heard from my boss yet today.

However, I was able to get home and have some sleep earlier than expected. That was well worth my Dhs2000. Besides, I will put them tomorrow on the company expense as “Entertainment”

Money well spent

Herlock Sholmes

12 Comments:

Blogger BuJ said...

wow.. your style is very similar to haroun's.. no wonder ppl were saying b4 that ur the same person..

i know.. someone's saying "duh" at the moment!

3:52 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Man your boss is a real pig!!!

I liked the fact that you didn't let her lips touch yours. Yuckkkkk imagine how many men she kissed or what else she licked before that.

5:03 PM  
Blogger Hot Lemon& Honey said...

LOL anon..true...

5:35 AM  
Blogger secretdubai said...

You can add a few zeros and put that money straight in your pocket if you remembered to get a hidden camera in.

11:35 PM  
Anonymous sAnonymous said...

It like the way the GF's age kept diminishing as the night progressed.

9:11 AM  
Anonymous Melaleuka said...

Dear Haroun & Dear (S)herlock,

My comments below have nothing to do with you current post, but I'd like to hear your oppinion.

We all know there is no such thing as a perfect mate and that searching for a mate is costly and time-consuming too.

Rather, we search for a mate until we find one who is good enough that the expected incremental costs of additional search outweigh the expected incremental benefits.
In a nutshell that is the Economics of Dating, and I guess is what we are all looking for…

And let's face it: when you are out on a date, you usually have a pretty good idea early on whether you think the date is going to work out. Yet you cannot say to your date, "Hey, this isn't working. How about we both just call our next best options?" Well, I suppose you guys can, but most of us wouldn't do that; rather, we would tough it out, and then look to the next person on the dynamic list for our next encounter.

If what I have said above is correct, it is easy to understand why speed-dating markets are successful. Good opportunities without any risks?
What do you say? Would it be possible such thing on a ‘dating market’ like Dubai’s?? haha, now I’m going to ask you if wanna join venture in a business plan like ‘speed-dating organizing’, do you think the authorities would have something against of??...they should not, as people will come for a drink, and a chit chat up to the bell’s next ring:-)

Tell me what do you think, I feel you clever guys will have some interesting input.
Cheers,
Melaleuka

2:17 PM  
Anonymous pi said...

no wonder companies in dubai hardly see any stellar profits. its all been going towards "entertainment". disgusting. ure boss is a shameless old man.

7:07 PM  
Blogger Taunted said...

You know, i've been seen on no less than 7 times now leaving Cyclone.

And I've never, ever been.

The rumours in this city really are shoite!

9:47 AM  
Blogger Sex and Dubai said...

Cyclone is quite fondly known as the Corporate Shag Quarters.

7:50 PM  
Blogger Qatar Cat said...

I should look it up when in Dubai... and prolly stay away!

2:59 PM  
Anonymous P said...

Where do I begin with your blog post on the cyclone encounter?

Let's start with the fairly obivious ones:

1. Sex trafficking is a huge industry in Dubai, and, you have just encouraged a multitude of men to not only exploit the services of sex workers (who in most likelihood, would have been trafficked to this part of the world with no recourse to human or labour rights) but also to belittle their very trade. Kudos on that.

2. On another note, you may have inadvertantly raised cyclone's reputation as a place to pick 'incentivised' women, thus once again, plugging the sex trafficking trade in Dubai and enslaving these women to further servitude at the hands of their pimps or captors.

3. Demonising sex workers in a city which does little to protect them in any case.

I hope you enjoyed making a mockery of the hundreds and thousands of sex workers throughout this region who need to service men like you (and your boss) in order to make ends meet and send remittance back to their home countries for their families, while living a fairly sub-human existence here.

I'm sure you'll sleep much better tonight.

12:09 PM  
Blogger Bella Anderson said...

Nice Thoughts.
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3:36 PM  

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