Mission Impossible
Next Thursday I have a dinner to go to. A dinner that requires me to have a date! And, if this wasn’t a big enough challenge, I am required to have a date that is both good looking and smart. So, from tonight until Thursday, I will be on an impossible mission: To find myself a decent date for the dinner.
Knowing that I was not armed with the proper weapons for this mission, I called in reinforcements in the form of a “player” friend of mine and started to ask him for some pointers and ammunition for my mission.
First on my list was the pick up line. Times have changed since I last had to use one and I was not sure that “Would you like to boogie” was still in vogue. My friend being a true ladies’ man (As sex-in-Dubai puts it in the comments “An asshole”), I thought he might have some much needed advice to give me. He came up with some gems that I thought would be worth mentioning here as he explains to me that they are the trend of the day.
I have a BMW would you like to go for a ride?
What time is it? I left my Rolex at home
Can I buy you a drink or would you like a slip?
Etc
It seems to me that the emphasis has shifted from what it was in my time (Showing how interesting you are) to showing how big your bank account it. While I would be classified by most a fairly well off in that department, I feel that there must be something much more substantive in the pick up line that I shall be using. After talking to several other “experts” and getting lines totally consistent with those above, it seems that I will have to rely on myself to find the right one. Of course, if the readers of this blog would like to contribute some ideas, they would be very much appreciated.
After the pick up line, it was time for me to seek some wardrobe help. You see, I am strictly and jeans/T Shirt and formal suit man. Meaning that I either go for the very simple jeans, sneakers and T shirt combination, or the formal suit and tie. I do not own anything in between as I never had a need for it. I have been told that this will not do and some friends have scheduled trip to Ralph Laurent and some other stores to replenish my stock and revive my wardrobe. Apparently, it is an integral part of the process. Sounds stupid to me, but I am willing to follow the advice of experts.
So, tonight I will be on supervised leash and let loose on the women in one of Dubai’s most popular clubs. My friends will be around, supervising my performance and giving me pointers. From my side, I don’t know why I don’t just pick up the phone and call the list of woman I know and ask them for a favor. But, I guess this way will be more fun.
I shall, of course, report back regularly on the progress of my efforts.
Haroun El Poussah
Knowing that I was not armed with the proper weapons for this mission, I called in reinforcements in the form of a “player” friend of mine and started to ask him for some pointers and ammunition for my mission.
First on my list was the pick up line. Times have changed since I last had to use one and I was not sure that “Would you like to boogie” was still in vogue. My friend being a true ladies’ man (As sex-in-Dubai puts it in the comments “An asshole”), I thought he might have some much needed advice to give me. He came up with some gems that I thought would be worth mentioning here as he explains to me that they are the trend of the day.
I have a BMW would you like to go for a ride?
What time is it? I left my Rolex at home
Can I buy you a drink or would you like a slip?
Etc
It seems to me that the emphasis has shifted from what it was in my time (Showing how interesting you are) to showing how big your bank account it. While I would be classified by most a fairly well off in that department, I feel that there must be something much more substantive in the pick up line that I shall be using. After talking to several other “experts” and getting lines totally consistent with those above, it seems that I will have to rely on myself to find the right one. Of course, if the readers of this blog would like to contribute some ideas, they would be very much appreciated.
After the pick up line, it was time for me to seek some wardrobe help. You see, I am strictly and jeans/T Shirt and formal suit man. Meaning that I either go for the very simple jeans, sneakers and T shirt combination, or the formal suit and tie. I do not own anything in between as I never had a need for it. I have been told that this will not do and some friends have scheduled trip to Ralph Laurent and some other stores to replenish my stock and revive my wardrobe. Apparently, it is an integral part of the process. Sounds stupid to me, but I am willing to follow the advice of experts.
So, tonight I will be on supervised leash and let loose on the women in one of Dubai’s most popular clubs. My friends will be around, supervising my performance and giving me pointers. From my side, I don’t know why I don’t just pick up the phone and call the list of woman I know and ask them for a favor. But, I guess this way will be more fun.
I shall, of course, report back regularly on the progress of my efforts.
Haroun El Poussah
posted by Haroun el Poussah at 1:20 PM
8 Comments:
I can't help you there buddy...
Back in the wonder years, I never had to go after girlz.. They were always after moi.
snif snif...
Oh Mory - I hope that Mrs M never visits this blog to see this comment!
ROTFLMAO!
I find obvious designer shirts a bit of a turn off most of the time. Especially the Ralph Lauren Polo ones.
For smart casual I would suggest looking for a discreet, non-garishly-patterned, shirt from somewhere like Debenhams. They have some "designer" lines there that aren't really blingy/obvious brand names.
And definitely avoid pale pink. About 99% of pink shirts are worn by vain men. (The other 1% are those that left a pair of red boxer shorts in the wash).
Jeans, bright coloured semi-fitted T-shirt (yellow is best option) and blazer. Bold and hhhot! You're prolly already at the bar by now though...
eh wo ana be paris shayfeta manna 'ossa ..
tawil balak ya zalame ..
imshe bil t shirt wil jeans .. inta baddak wa7de 3a shaklak yamma baddak wa7de 3a albak ..
Envying you for your biggest concern is dating. Wish you luck.
Well, looking at the current chat up lines, I am ecstatic I am not in the dating game. I do know if a man came up to me announcing his Beemer or Rolex, I would 110% not even bother to reply. I think thats so shallow. A man who has it doesnt need to "HO" himself.
But it depends a lot on where you will be going. Because if thats the level of a woman's IQ then you are best of dressing like Johnny Bravo!
I think what would really attract and interest me would be a guy with some new gadget, that didn't get all huffy when I started peeking at it, and let me have a look. Like a new PDA or video ipod or something. Unlike the rude bastard at a tech products expo who got all snotty when several people showed interest in his infrared projection keyboard.
Someone sitting in a bar surfing the web on a PDA, oblivious to everyone else around them, would be my ideal guy.
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