Sunday, January 21, 2007

Telemarketing

It is generally quite difficult for someone I don’t know to get in touch with me. Even if he has my email or telephone number it is not that easy. I get about 1500 emails a day and usually I only answer a few and I never answer calls from numbers I don’t know. I transfer those to my secretary. Also, my phone is usually on silent 99% of the time and I miss a lot of calls.

Over the last 3-4 days I’ve received no less that 35 calls from the telesales lady at the Shangri La trying to sell me a VIP card. Each time she called she left a message with my secretary who was too nice to tell her I was not interested.

So, this morning when she called, I picked up:

Me: “Good morning”
Shangri La Lady (SLL): “Good morning Mr. Sholmes”
Me: “Good morning”
SLL: “I am calling you regarding our VIP card”
Me: “Yes?”
SLL: “Are you interested Sir? If you accept, you get 30% discount on most outlet and a SPA massage for free”
Me: “I get a free massage?”
SLL: “Yes, are you interested?”
Me: “Of course, a free massage would do me a world of good”
SLL: “Excellent, let me just confirm your details. Your name is Herlock Sholmes?”
Me: “Yes”
SLL: “And you are still a Tiny Kahuna at your company?”
Me: “No, I moved to Dubai Transport
SLL: “OH, excellent, and what do you do there?”
Me: “Taxi Driver”

I am sure, she will not call again

Herlock Sholmes

5 Comments:

Blogger Hot Lemon& Honey said...

LOL I liked that .

11:54 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Please explain to me what a "Kahuna" is. I feel like I'm missing the point here...

5:42 PM  
Blogger secretdubai said...

I am sure, she will not call again

Except to book you for a ride...

1:27 AM  
Blogger ADinamorato said...

The best part is that you could say anything you want and their forced to keep up with you. :)

You gotta give this a try, say something, a question or a comment, and repeat it over and over with the same voice tone.
for example, ask: whats the price?
answer: 300 DHS sir...
you: whats the price?
her: mmm.. 300 DHS sir..
you: (silent for 10 seconds)
you: whats the price?

you can be more creative here.. :)

7:29 PM  
Blogger Sex and Dubai said...

@ anonymous 542 : Kahuna i.e. big boss, king kong, head honcho.

@ SecretDubai: Or to take him for one...

7:47 PM  

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