Thursday, December 07, 2006

Nuts and Bolts

Over a wonderful dish of Lasagne she told me: “Haroun, you eat like a pig. Half of the lasagna ends up on your shirt”

Over a wonderful glass of Chianti she told me: “Haroun, you drink like a fish, you are disgusting”

Over a decent Tiramisu she told me: “Haroun, you swine, leave the sweets alone”

And, I thought she didn’t like me. Turns out she is into the Submissive, Repulsive, whip and cuffs kinda thing. So, I tried to explain to her that, as long as I am the one doing the whipping, cuffing, slapping, spitting, cursing, biting, kicking and punching, we could do as much of it as she wanted

Turns out she is into doing the whipping, cursing, kicking and punching. I told her that if she thought I was willing to get whipped to sleep with her she had delusions of grandeur.

She told me to shut the fuck up or she’ll smack me

I told her that I wanted to do the smacking because right about now I really thought she deserved it

I took a step back, making sure to stay out of reach. You never know what those crazy females can do in a restaurant. They get turned on by pretty weird things. Then, she proceeds to tell me that she would like to bite my balls off. I almost fainted. My balls? Bite them off? Is she nuts?

I tell you, getting a reliable date in Dubai these days is like playing Russian roulette with your balls. I have been to weird places in this world of ours. Be it Nigeria, the Australian Outback, Brazil, Togo, Benin, Saudi Arabia… No woman has ever offered to bite my balls off… I was expecting someone to offer to served them up with Ketchup a few times (Brazil, and Australia), and I was expecting a man to offer to bite them off once (Saudi Arabia), but… you know… total shock

Haroun El Poussah

3 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

So did you let her bite them........

2:01 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I SUGGEST U GET UR BALLS RIPPED OFF. THAT WAY YOU CAN BUM FUCK UR BOYFRIENDS AND SUPPORT TEAMS BETTER AND THEY WONT SAY U DONT FIT WELL. SHE CAN FINALLY TURN INTO THE MAN SHE WANTED TO BE WITH UR BALLS SINCE U COULDNT BE ONE IN THE FIRST PLACE. OR LET HER WIN A COUPLE OF PINBALL GAMES ITS GOOD 4 UR SOUL.

11:53 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Absolutely hilarious!!! I was laughing so hard tears were rolling down!!

So did you allow her take a bite?

3:06 AM  

Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home