Tuesday, November 07, 2006

Margaret Thatcher Called

Yesterday, my Ex called!

After 2 months without so much as a whisper, it seems that she now broke up with her boyfriend, read the blog and proposed to join me at the Thursday dinner.

I told her that I would rather go with a Pregnant, emasculated cockroach than with her. I am not sure she took it in the spirit with which it was said because she burst out laughing. I intended to be rude, obnoxious, detestable, vile, revolting and truthful. She thought I was joking. You’d think that after 6 years together she would know better

Anyhow, when she understood that I was quite serious, she proceeded to recommend a friend of hers that we both know is indeed a Pregnant, emasculated cockroach. She said we would be perfect there together.

It goes to show that you can be with a woman for 6 years and not know the first thing about her. Or maybe, it goes to show that, over 6 years I was so mean to her that I transformed her into the woman she is today. Who know?

That, however, does not solve my Thursday night dilemma.

Tonight a couple that I know have invited me to dinner and are bringing a lady that they know and think would be perfect for me (and me for her I hope). I have been friends with these people for quite a while and they know me very well. I trust their judgment and am looking forward to meeting that girl. I will try to be my usual charming self…

One thing I don’t do in early dates is open the car door, pull chairs at restaurants, walk her to the door (unless I want a kiss) or be overly polite. I always think that the worse thing you can do is set a standard early on that you are not prepared to carry on for ever. It creates disappointment and gives the girl the feeling that early on it was all an act to impress her. I prefer to be my usual inconsiderate self from the beginning, this way I avoid disappointment and the woman knows exactly what she is getting herself into. My old advisors used to tell me that this is bullshit and that I should lie my teeth out in the beginning, get her interested, get her in bed and then drop the act when she can’t move away. I wonder what my new team of advisors thinks about that…

Haroun El Poussah

7 Comments:

Blogger secretdubai said...

I open car doors and pull chairs for friends and associates regardless of gender. It has no romantic motives, I just regard it as normal manners.

1:59 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Apropos your quest, been there done that.
Here is some advice for you to ignore, though it is the sum of all truth.

Stop trying.
Nothing will work until you stop trying.
Women are superior animals to men in every way which is one of the best and nicest things about them. They know when you are trying even if you don't and there is nothing they appreciate less than that "Man for Sale" sign.

Relax, enjoy life and if some female of the species decides you are worthy and selects you, treat her with care and courtesy.
No deal otherwise.

2:27 PM  
Blogger Sex and Dubai said...

Your ex is now going to read your blog and silently fume for another two months.

How is it possible to be pregnant and emasculated? Maybe a hermaphrodite is the word you were looking for? ;)

We think you should be yourself, dont raise expectations if they aren't going to be sustained. So no opening car doors etc etc. Your old team of advisors sounds like the atypical dubai male species. i.e. use and abuse, then drop like a sack of potatoes.

4:58 PM  
Blogger inmotion said...

this whole blog wreaks of chauvanism

6:35 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Relax, enjoy life and if some female of the species decides you are worthy and selects you, treat her with care and courtesy.
No deal otherwise


Haroun you may want to take this anonymous' advice , sounds good to me.

By the way why don't you try on-line dating ?
If you need to take someone with you to the party, how about a cousin ?

7:05 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

LOOOOOOL@MARGARET THATCHER :)
I guess that settles the argument about who wore the trousers, lol.
I think the Ex is going to fume big time about this blog, especially when she reads the good news on Friday morning.. or maybe you'll be too busy to blog, and that will make the cinder crackle...

2:33 AM  
Blogger KareemFromEgypt said...

@inmotion: maybe that's why we love this blog

i say a little chauvanism goes a long way

nice work haroun, love the blog

11:50 PM  

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